There’s only so much writers can do when trying to turn a bad concept into a good story.

With Hasbro set on turning the classic game Monopoly into a Broadway musical, I think watching them try to pull it off will be more entertaining than the final product.

Not that I’m lambasting whoever is writing the script. (I don’t even know who that is, anyway.) On the contrary, I’m applauding them. I don’t think I’ve ever heard of a more difficult writing job.

The group that is producing it, the Araca Group, has said that the story is not about a bunch of people sitting around playing Monotony Monopoly. Instead, the story is set in the world of Monopoly, which means, I guess, you’ll get to meet the bald guy with the top hat and the strange moustache.

But hey, wait! Isn’t Monopoly a game about buying and selling properties, and then developing hotels and houses on top of them to bankrupt the other players? I think I found Monopoly: The Musical a main character already.

Donald Trump

Yes, of course, the Donald, the real estate superstar. If the musical turns out to be a biopic of Donald Trump, well then, it’ll be interesting to see the Monopoly guy have a fox on his head. Maybe the fox will eat the Monopoly board.

On a more serious note (not that this topic is serious in any way), I wonder how they’re going to pull this off. As I said, some writer is probably going to pull their hair out trying to write the script. Maybe basing it off Trump will make it somewhat interesting, especially if he, um, does become President of the United States.

But other games have been turned into shows, like The Angry Birds Movie. That movie has made over $300 million, but then again, critics have given it poor reviews, with one critic even saying that the movie is “pointless because it’s pointless.” My fear, or really, expectation, is that Monopoly: The Musical will be that way as well.

Why do I think that?

Well, maybe part of the reason why I say that is because I think Monopoly is the most boring game on earth. (At least Tic Tac Toe is short. Monopoly goes on forever.) My question is then, “how can an exciting show be based off a boring game?” Well, that’s prejudice.

Another reason why, maybe just for me, is that Monopoly isn’t Magic: the Gathering, or even Catan. Firstly, those games are actually fun, and secondly, they’re a lot less abstract. Sure, Monopoly sort of has a theme: buying and selling land, but really, it’s a bit thin. Magic: the Gathering, another Hasbro game, on the other hand, has a whole universe behind it. Maybe they should make a musical about that. However, I do concede that maybe having less of a developed world will allow the scriptwriters more room to create a world that will sustain a story. Who knows?

Well, the musical is expected to arrive on stage three years from now, which means that it will be 2019 when it comes out. I only have one thought for the intervening years: this will be interesting.

Anyway, what do you think of a Monopoly movie?

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Posted by dyl8nkw0k

Blogger and editor at 64thopinion.com. Writes about life, books, science fiction and fantasy, games, technology, and film.

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